Picture this muntu wandi: you want to travel to kabwe, kapiri, ndola kitwe chingola or upwards. You drop at kamwala or in Lima tower, you even buy some mineral water and crisps…
You can’t wait to reach kopala-belt and see abantu bobe! You reach by Inter-City Bus Terminus around 08hrs in the morning and some ka guy with short dirty kinky brown dread locks in a ka blue work suit with tickets a black macker and silo-tape in his hands rushes to you, “bakamba muleya kwisa? Kitwe? Kwasala chabe babili boss”..
you ignore the ka guy, you know your business in intercity is either Mazandhu, Euro or ngafyapena Power tools..just as you are waiting in queue at Euro or Mazandhu, 5 more over zealous guys come to you, “boss kwasala chabe umozi manje, tiyambako apa so!”..you are tempted, ichibanda chakukola you say to yourself, “well let me have a look”..you go to the bus and yes there is only one or two empty seats..
You buy a ticket! BIG MISTAKE!
The ticket its looks like a ticket from the council public toilet receipt. As you enter the bus, two call boys stand up and go to receive a payment for being seat fillers. Then the devil leaves you and realise you jus got on satan’s bus, CHEMBE! 30minutes no passenger coming on, 1hours some ka Mbuya is gongad and she comes in with a huge Ukwa Sack bag! 2 hours 3 hours you still there.
People’s tempers begin to rise, the shout for a refund and the stupid guy selling the toilet receipts, oh sorry the tickets is nowhere to be seen! He has miraculously disappeared in the grass!
Then as it is now 15 hours, you are now looking outside the window like an orphan, sad and angry seeing bus after bus take off! The stupid driver to your chembe makes you even more furious by mocking as if you going to start off and raves the bus, ‘huuummmm hummmm hummm mzzzzzzuuuu’ but no movement…
it will be 17 or 18 before you start off, you are already feeling tired and pressed just at Findeco house and next toilet is at kabwe big-bite (famous for its dry and badly cooked chicken) which is in 2hrs30min…you reach chisamba too too pressed, imisu shakwikata! No option but to go to the driver and ask for a ‘sunda station’…you are thinking to yourself “am pressed alone” and as you stand to walk to the Driver the whole bus looking at you like you have peed on yourself or something silly!
You ask the driver whom you were cursing mu station “ba mudala nitundeko” and as he slows down telling you to hurry up, to your suprise, almost the whole bus drops off to pee with you!
Now the bush is full of activity with fitenges flying all over! Ok don’t look at women boi, you might have a ‘sonkela’! fast fast you get back to the bus and journey continues….blu blu blu blu you get to kitwe 21hours past when you left home at 08hours!!!! Anyway, Some buses in inter-city be careful, they can make you regret! A 5 hour journey turns into 15 hours!!!!